PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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