Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize