this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
