i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Well I just put wine in my tea
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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