I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
