Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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