Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Say something about gay babies.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
