Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
