And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
