Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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