Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
