Ambien. No doubt about it.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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