I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
