oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
