i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
