grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
What did we do last night that was yellow?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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