yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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