i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize