im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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