it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
