I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize