sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
