Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
