the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I need to calm my uterus...
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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