Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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