They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize