I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize