My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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