So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
This house was built for laser tag.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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