im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
