We won't sleep together?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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