Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
