Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
