there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
