Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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