so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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