You're so nebulous sometimes
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
