He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
