His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize