I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
