yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
What a dumb baby whore.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
