do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
