new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Randomize
