why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have tasted many bathrooms
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
he's single and there are thong briefs.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize