Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
