I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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