seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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