Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
