I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
