I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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