so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
