Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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